“Vi rginity is like a balloon; one prick and it is gone.” Those
were the first words I woke up to every morning my first year in
tertiary institution. The words were on a poster stuck on my hostel room
wall. I loved it so much I steamed the poster off the wall at the end
of the session. I thought it was really funny – especially when you
think of it as it concerns a guy losing his vi rginity.
I attended a polytechnic and after my
ND, I had to go for the requisite one year Industrial Training program
before continuing. And this, was where it happened.
See, I read a lot growing up and having four older siblings meant I also read a lot of age inappropriate books.
At age ten, I knew a lot of things I should not know. I remember
wondering why in primary 5 my teacher was uncomfortable talking about
puberty when I already knew about s*x from reading Harold Robbins and
Jackie Collins.
For my attachment, I went to Warri and
was fortunate to be accepted by a company contracted to cater to Shell
Petroleum DC. I had barely worked six weeks when the company won an
offshore catering contract and I got drafted onto the team. I was so
excited, I could not sleep for days.
I have only travelled on land, and by
road at that, so the opportunity to travel over water was exciting. We
would be stationed in Bayelsa, and having heard ribald stories of ‘Rig
Life’, I could hardly wait!. Was I going to be sea sick? Would I throw
up violently? Would we encounter rough seas? How was life at sea sef?
Too many questions… And the women. Were there going to be women?
Ooohhh, excitement leaking out of every pore!
The day came and we were taken to the shipyard where we were shown a houseboat. As
soon as I crossed from the jetty to the houseboat, I forgot I was on
water. The trip to the Rig was three days long by tugboat, but it didn’t
feel like it. There were too many new sites to take in. From children
paddling canoes, women laying their nets, men hauling in the catch,
whole villages on stilts, and in a place called Burutu, the divide
between salt water and fresh water – one word: Simply amazingly
breathtaking!
Just before we got to the Rig we were
met by the welcoming committee, a regular flotila of canoes. By the time
the Rig came into view, we looked like a Spanish Armada invading
Newfoundland. Less than five hours after arriving on the Rig, the small
piece of land nearby had been cleared, and stick and sack tents were
going up – a community populated by women and children.
Life offshore consisted of waking up,
serving breakfast, clearing up, napping, serving lunch, lounging on the
barge, getting some exercise in or games, dinner, a movie, and on some
days, a trip into town.
Those were the days to look forward to,
the trips into town. Especially considering everyone on the houseboat,
and the Rig, were male. The trips into town afforded everyone the
opportunity to indulge – whatever your vice. I was about the women but,
for all my mouthing off, I am too liverless to just step up to a girl.
On our fourth trip into town, one of the
men noticed how I kept stealing glances at this girl he was with. The
girl in question was petite but well endowed where it mattered to me.
She was really courageous. Her reason was not bad to look at either, but her courage was
right in front of us. So this man called me to the side and asked if I
liked what I saw. Not caring if it was a trick question or not, I
nodded. He left me sitting there and went back to the girl. He whispered
something to her, she giggled, looked at me knowingly and walked away.
I just got up and followed her like a
zombie. My feet felt wooden, and I could feel the eyes boring into my
back. After a few steps, I set my shoulders in my ‘warreva’ mode and
ducked into her apartment. The lighting was poor, ventilation was non existent, but I was not there for the aesthetics was I?
As if reading my thoughts, she brushed
against me and it was electric. Then she pulled out a cigarette and lit
up. I was mildly disappointed that she smoked, but when she pulled me
close all that soft flesh made me forget about cigarette smoke until she
kissed me. Then she stepped out of her clothes. Then we were on the bed
with me still fully clothed. I was still trying to play love when
she pushed me unto my back, worked my belt faster and more expertly
than I and straddled me. I reached up to grab something and had my hand
unceremoniously slapped away. It was over before it began for me, and
she jumped off, picked up her cigarette where she had left it and
resumed smoking.
What?! This could not be what was so beautifully written about in those books I read all those years ago.
I was quiet on the boat ride home. I
went straight to my room, searched in my bag for the dog-eared copy of
‘Seven Minutes’ by Irvin Wallace which I carried everywhere. I flipped
the pages till I found the folded paper I was looking for. It was
creased and yellowed with age, but the words were still legible. I took
out my pen and wrote in one word so that now it read: “Vi rginity is like a balloon; one prick and it is gone. Forever.“

(+2348146017053).. Nigeria Custom Auction NOTIFICATION OF SALES 2016/2017 NIGERIA
ReplyDeleteCUSTOMS IMPOUNDED AUCTION VEHICLES, THIS
AUCTION CARS HAVE BEEN ADVERTISED ALL OVER
THE NATION AND WEBSITE E.G- WEBSITE, ON
TELEVISION AND RADIO STATIONS, AND
NEWSPAPERS. These vehicles are Nigeria Customs Impounded vehicles given out at Auction prices.
We have these cars for sale right now. We deliver
all over the 36State in Nigeria. WE HAVE DIRECT
TOKUNBO CARS VERY CLEAN AND BRAND NEW
CARS FOR SALE AT A CHEAPER PRICES
ADDRESS:NIGERIA CUSTOMS BORDER HEAD
OFFICE COMMAND ZONE 1, IDI-IROKO BORDER OGUN STATE
CUSTOM WARE HOUSE****** ABUBAKAR MUSA ON (08146017053) . These cars
were seized by government officials at border and the time duration given to the owners to claim
their cars has elapse so they are been sold in a
give away price.All you need do is to call
CUSTOM ABUBAKAR MUSA ON ******(08146017053)****** to place an order
of your choice.
CAR FEATURES BELOW Acura MDX #800,000
Acura TL #600,000
Acura ZDX #700,000
Audi 80 #300,000
Audi A4 #400,000
Audi A6 #400,000 BMW 3-Series #650,000
BMW 5-Series #750,000
BMW X5 #750,000
BMW X6 #550,000
Ford Escape #600,000
Ford Explorer #500,000 Honda Accord #350,000-#500,000
Honda City #350,000
Honda Civic #300,000
Honda Crosstour #750,000-#950,000
Honda CR-V #550,000
Honda Odyssey #550,000 Honda Pilot #750,000
Hyundai Accent #650,000
Hyundai Elantra #400,000
Infiniti FX35 #800,000
Infiniti FX45 #1,000,000
Infiniti QX4 #800,000 Isuzu Trooper #650,000
Jaguar S-Type #550,000
Jeep Liberty #1,000,000
Kia Sorento #350,000
Land Rover Discovery #1,000,000
Land Rover Freelander #1,000,000 Land Rover LR3 #1,100,000
Land Rover LR4 #1,200,000
Land Rover Range Rover #1,500,000
Land Rover #1,000,000
Range Rover Sport #1,600,000
Land Rover Vogue #1,000,000 Lexus GS #800,000
Lexus GX460 #700,000
Lexus GX470 #1,000,000
Lexus LX 570 #750,000
Lexus RX 300 #750,000
Lexus RX 330 #750,000 Lexus RX 350 #800,000
Mazda 6 #550,000
Mazda 626 #550,000
Mazda MPV #650,000
Mazda Tribute #950,000
Mercedes-Benz C-Class #550,000-#1,230,000 Mercedes-Benz E-Class #750,000-#1,200,000
Mercedes-Benz G-Class #550,000-#1,100,000
Mercedes-Benz GLK 570,000-#1,300,000
Mercedes-Benz ML #500,000
Mitsubishi Endeavour #450,000
Nissan Altima #650,000 Nissan Armada #550,000
Nissan Maxima #510,000
Nissan Murano #600,000
Nissan Pathfinder #600,000
Nissan Primera #300,000
Nissan Quest #700,000 Nissan Sentra #700,000
Nissan Xterra #600,000
Peugeot 406 #360,000
Peugeot 407 #290,000
Peugeot 607 #390,000
Toyota 4Runner #650,000 Toyota Avalon #600,000
Toyota Avensis#550,000
Toyota Camry #400,000-#600,000
Toyota Corolla #400,000-#650,000
Toyota FJ Cruiser #650,000
Toyota Hiace #550,000 Toyota Highlander #450,000-#850,000
Toyota HiLux #510,000
Toyota Matrix #300,000-#500,000
Toyota Prado #650,000
Toyota Rav4 #500,000
Toyota Sequoia #650,000 Toyota Sienna #500,000-#800,000
Toyota Tacoma #400,000
Toyota Tundra #650,000
Toyota Venza #600,000
Toyota Yaris #550,000
Volkswagen Beetle #200,000 Volkswagen Golf #200,000-#300,000
Volkswagen Jetta #200,000
Volkswagen Passat #250,000
Volkswagen Touareg #300,000
We deliver cars to all over the 36State in Nigeria.
Interested persons should contact the P.R.O Officer: CUSTOM THE P.R.O CUSTOM ABUBAKAR ON: ******(08146017053)******
Address: NIGERIA CUSTOMS BORDER HEAD
OFFICE COMMAND ZONE 1, IDI-IROKO BORDER OGUN STATE
CUSTOM WARE HOUSE,.
REQUIREMENT FOR CLEARANCE AS AN
INDIVIDUALS IS AS FOLLOWS:
( IF YOU ARE COMING OVER: A TELLER OF #45,000 FOR THE CUSTOM PERMIT )
1. SCAN COPY OF VALID NATIONAL ID-CARD OR DRIVERS LICENSE]
2. SCAN COPY OF UTILITY BILL / RECENT MONTH]
3. SCAN COPY OF PASSPORT PHOTOGRAPH ]
4. SCAN COPY OF LOCAL GOVERNMENT OF ORIGIN]
NOTE:-NO BUYER SHOULD COME DOWN WITH
MONEY TO THE OFFICE FOR SECURITY REASON... CONTACT (P.R.O) CUSTOM ABUBAKAR MUSA ON ******(08146017053)*******
REGARDS FROM THE NIGERIA CUSTOM SERVICE.... 08146017053